Throughout my normal day I have lots of silly thoughts. Those who know me are probably not surprised by that. I keep most of my silliness to myself. But not today. Yesterday, while standing in the line at the grocery store, I was thinking about having supernatural editing powers. I could change checkout line magazine titles to read humorous things specific to the person standing behind me. Then I started wondering how to make a man-sized hamster wheel. Would it need some sort of breaking system? I’m not sure… but that’s not actually what I want to talk about today…
Today I’m wondering what kind of real-life job my favorite fantasy characters would have. Take Drizzt Do’Urden, the dark elf swordmaster from R.A. Salvatore‘s Forgotten Realms books. Drizzt is known for his spectacular sword play and acrobatic fighting prowess. I think he’d make a perfect Teppanyaki chef at your local Japanese steak house. Drizzt’s shrimp flipping and onion volcanoes would be known across the lands.
Who’s that behind the meat counter at Walmart? He’s a big dude, with long black hair and he’s scowling at a hunk of meat that needs to be cut for the old lady impatiently tapping her fingers on the counter. Why, it’s none other than Conan the Barbarian… err, Conan the Butcher, and the gods only know why the old witch won’t buy a bigger crockpot. By Crom, he hates this job and old ladies!
So, what would your favorite fantasy character’s day job be?