I have to admit that I have not read Clash of Star-Kings, but with a cover like this, I’m not likely to pick it up when I see it in my local used bookstore. (And that’s a shame because I’ve read other fine books by Avram Davidson.)
So, if I’m not going to read Clash of Star-Kings, at least I can help rename it with a title that better fits this cover.
Please help me.
Author
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KAT HOOPER, who started this site in June 2007, earned a Ph.D. in neuroscience and psychology at Indiana University (Bloomington) and now teaches and conducts brain research at the University of North Florida. When she reads fiction, she wants to encounter new ideas and lots of imagination. She wants to view the world in a different way. She wants to have her mind blown. She loves beautiful language and has no patience for dull prose, vapid romance, or cheesy dialogue. She prefers complex characterization, intriguing plots, and plenty of action. Favorite authors are Jack Vance, Robin Hobb, Kage Baker, William Gibson, Gene Wolfe, Richard Matheson, and C.S. Lewis.
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I’ll get my suggestion for the horrible cover soon but I wanted to suggest a topic for TT, in case you are ever low – book deal breakers, things that if you find in the synopsis/cover/title or whatever that will make you absolutely not buy/read/continue reading a particular book. I know everyone has some!
Thanks, April! We’ll do that soon.
As for the book cover up there, well, this is definitely not the most attractive or aesthetically pleasing cover I’ve seen. It looks like the cover to the popular self-help book, “Anti-Aging Cream Horrors, a Clinical Study”
The Lizard Men Invade Hawaii
The Alien Guide to African Tourism
“Opera; Then and Now.”
I like “Anti-Aging Cream Horrors.”
A couple of tongue-in-cheek ideas: “Soylent Green is Lizards!” and “Demons and Lizards”.
The Anciently Classic Tunes of Bob Marley, as sung by Jar Jar Binks
22 Classic Earth songs brought back to life by the tuneful pipes of everyone’s favorite Gungan. Yes, they’re all here, from I Shot the Emperor to Buffalo Stormtrooper to No Jedi, No Cry, to Satisfy My Soul Ja Ba And you won’t believe who stops by for a duet of “Redemption Song”. Yes, it’s his old friend Anakin Skywalker.
As a special bonus, if you order now, for a limited time, you’ll also receive Jar Jar Sings Bar-Bar: A Whimsical Tour Through Streisand-Land.
Ugh!
(Which is one of my most common responses to things that Bill says.)
You mean these are not the jokes you are looking for?
That particular joke just is why millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.
I see what you did there. Well played sir.
“Dragons in Dresses – a fashion frightener” or how about “Frocks of the Crocs – book one of The Dior Disaster”
My Blind Date was an Alien
Top Ten Reasons to Avoid Blind Dates
GAH!
I was going to cast my vote for Bill, but then I read Chris’ Frocks of the Crocs and think you should declare a tie. Anti Aging is a good one too… Glad I’m not on the actual voting committee.
Ouch, Bill, that’s as disturbing as the cover itself!
The Curse of the Were-Jackal
War and Screech
Decibel 451
Anger a Wizard — Turn into a Lizard
Kicking Lizard-Creature Butt (Memoirs of James T. Kirk, Vol III)
The Dangers of Online Dating
“Do I Look Fat in This?” and Other Stories from Senior Prom
Tongue like a Lizard — Why I Married an Alien
The Failed Cure for Spiderman
Oh these are getting good!
In Zog We Trust (All Others Pay Cash)
K-Tel Records presents: Rockin’ Forgotten Songs of the 1580’s
It’s a Trapp — the story of the alien who really inspired The Sound of Music.
Adventures of a Geico Lizard
Gieco: the Insurance of Kings
Muppet Apocalypto
Chris J, if you live in the USA, you win a book of your choice from our stacks.
Please contact me (Marion) with your choice and a US address.
“Frocks of the Crocs” did it.
Hi Marion. Unfortunately I live in the UK so I will have to be satisfied with basking in the glory of being chosen as the winner, but I can happily live with that. Might try & find the actual original book as a prize I can then award to myself. :-)
Just to confirm that I’ve found a copy of this book and have ordered it. The cover is (thankfully) very different.
OK, that is awesome. Please tell us how you like it, Chris!
And if you want to enter today’s giveaway, it’s also available in the UK (in ebook format).
We have our winner, but I have to say, the selections here were wonderful. Kat, this was one of our most inspiring bad covers.
That was a fun one! They all had me chuckling!
April, if you live in the USA, you win a book of your choice from our stacks.
Please contact me (Marion) with your choice and a US address. Please be aware that I will be computerless for about two weeks, so there may be a delay in getting you your book.
Thanks to Kat for sharing one of the most inspiring horrible covers yet!
Woot!